Tag Archives: funny

Oh yeah?! YOU are slower than Halloween! No Easter!

Davis, in retaliating to Daddy saying he was slower than Christmas because it takes him 45 min to get ready for bed. (So cute when they don’t quite understand grown-up humor.)

Loves performing. Loves freestyling. Come to think of it this kid’s whole life is free style.

Best part is he doesn’t seem to realize he no longer needs to make the guitar sounds with his mouth for accompaniment now that he actually has a guitar. Classic.

Why my son thinks I am a babysitter

Davis: Mommy, do you work really far?
Mommy: You mean far away? No, I am pretty close to the house and to school.
Davis: Then why can’t you come stay at school with me?
Mommy: Oh hunny, I have to be at work. I have people to talk with and I have lots to do. It’s like your teachers — they stay at school all day with you don’t they?
Davis: Yeah, they can’t leave us because they have to protect us and make sure we don’t get in trouble.
Mommy: Yes, exactly, I have to do the same at the office. (I was thinking the staying there part)
Davis: So they don’t get in trouble or lost?
Mommy: Exactly. (Hey, on any given day it’s highly possible this is true.)

(And let it be known my little manipulator expects a half day visit, but this Mommy will be there for the appropriate lunch-time party.)

They call me Peter Pan

My dad has always said you are as young as you feel. I thought it was a mantra for just himself and saying it out loud made him feel it must be true. Mom always joked she had three kids, my dad being the biggest of them all. But I have realized for my dad it is reality to him. I know because I now understand.

Here I am at 34 with my second child cradled in my arms, and I realize I have the Peter Pan syndrome too. I refer to myself, (at least in my head), as a girl not a woman. I still think my age is closer to kids in high school than their parents and am convinced I cpuld relate to them with this age logic. And I look in the mirror and don’t really think I’ve changed much since college, neck up anyway. Order up! I’ll have a side of toned up arms and abs, please. And hold the post-baby tummy sag.

But I am holding the proof I have aged. The fact that there are more than 40 pounds of boy sleeping snuggled up next to me is astounding! I am incredulous I have a five-year-old, and oh so glad we didn’t wait any longer.

Age may be a state of mind, but the mind can’t ignore what the body is saying, especially when it’s too tired to fight back.

A Comedy of Errors: Hospital style

I can’t even recap the whole day but I can tell you about the last 3 hours with a delirious smile, because all we can do at this point is laugh.

Bryan’s brother was super kind and satisfied our need to eat something healthy with a big salad and some fruit. But, we got interrupted at least 3 times. First, we were trying to time Reese’s feeding with the nurse’s schedule to give meds, and that meant we had to also get her IV cleaned up so that requires at least an hour of pre-planning because you have to find a tech or an ER person who can handle her tiny veins. But even when that was cleared up there was still no high chair to be found anywhere. Not sure how that is possible in a children’s hospital. So we fed poor Reese in an execsaucer that she was really too tall for. Here she is surrounded by pretty colored toys for the first time in 3 days and we expect her to ignore them to eat! And as if that wasn’t enough, half way through her scarfing down 4 oz of baby food, we smelled either sulfur from a lit match or could have been like plastic melting, I was ready to detach her from all the devices and carry her and saucer out the door. But they decided it was in the ventilation system. Disaster avoided.

Reese didn’t nap at all today. The new anti-convulsant is kicking in. So when they were dilly dallying about all these things to get done I warned them once she is asleep I am not letting you near here. So of course, in all the earlier commotion nurse forgot to take Reese’s blood pressure. She came in and basically I think I could see her change her mind. Said she HAD to do it in about 3 hrs. I nodded politely.

And last, but not least, the video tech couldnt see R in the crib. Hello!??! We have been in this room for 8 hours and he waits until she is finally asleep to have us move her damn crib around so it is in a better position for the ceiling video camera. Of course the 1950s-style asylum crib wheels squeak and we bump just about everything else in the tiny room trying to adjust the crib about 30 degrees. Seriously.

Comedy of errors I tell ya.

Davisisms strike again

Davis: Mommy, I have 3 girlfriends!
Me: Well, what do you do with a girlfriend?
Davis: Get married. (in silly giddy voice, Lord help me!)
Me: Ohhhh, well I think we can only handle one girlfriend in this house. (holding back the sarcasm, ok maybe not very well.)
Davis: Awwww. I can’t pick just one!!!! They’re all so cuuute!!!!