Facing fears

The real fear kicks in tomorrow. It won’t be immediate, and she could possibly be fine until our surgery date April 1, but stepping down off her steroid is the beginning of our final phase of this. At least until we start all over with new challenges after surgery. And so I think all the waiting and the surreal state we have lived in for the past 6 months is about to dissolve. With that, I admit the real fear is inching into my mind.

I dreamed she came out of surgery and said Mama first thing. Reality is I am just hoping she recognizes me with those big eyes and gives us an epic Reese smile to say I love you.

Our emergency bags are packed, we have a calendar for the grandparents and a plan for spring break. I want you to know I have seen pictures of what this will look like and it’s not pretty. So we will limit our postings and photos this time. We will do what we can to keep you updated once we are in the hospital,
I just don’t know what it will be like. So bare with us when the time comes.

All of you continue to touch my heart and amaze with me your love and support. You ask how we are, you go out of your way to show you care. One of the best things you can do right now is support our walk at the zoo. We are The Stomp Brigade. Davis is our captain and it’s a great way for him to experience all the love you have for our family. I have no idea how it feels to be him, the wonderful big brother with no way of protecting his baby sister. But we want him to feel involved and this will be something that keeps him connected to her and distracted at the same time. Most likely Reese won’t be at the walk, we will be in the hospital, but we will live the moment through all of you and no doubt lots of pictures.

Our page. http://eftx.donordrive.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=donorDrive.team&teamID=6398

You can also give blood. They say she will lose a lot between the two surgeries and so if you prefer, giving blood would be a great gesture. Doesn’t matter where you are, I believe in paying back what we take. Thank you!