Fourth of July is Supposed to be Fun

So excited to be on this trip. To get to be out of our house. To let Davis run wild and allow Reese to explore new things. To be spoiled by my parents who are thrilled at sharing all they love with us. To do it up on the Fourth like we did when we were kids. To just be normal.

Plus, I know I am trying not to take it all for granted that only 35 days ago we had the scariest day of our lives. You ask how she is and of course the answer is great. Anything is better than the worst nightmares we’ve had. I have been so optimistic because it’s really the only option in my book. I wouldn’t know how else to live.

And then it’s like you have a few good weeks and you forget the fear. It’s nice to forget but it always hurts more because you feel like an idiot for letting down your guard. You tell yourself “you knew better!” And you sigh. And maybe you cry.

I’m holding on to a sliver of that former full moon of optimism right now, while I hold my sweet exhausted girl.

It’s easier to say it here than to your faces, all your amazing, beautiful faces who love us so. She had a seizure after we got unpacked at my folks and we totally didn’t see it coming. Yes she has an ear infection. But she had been on antibiotics for 48 hrs and normally it’s the first symptom. So we waited and when she seemed to be stable we figured we got past it. I was really thinking this was the sign we needed that surgery may have been the cure. An ear infection with no seizure would have been proof. We still need to give it time. It has to be the answer.

She slept and she went the next 2 days all normal. The pictures are proof of her good mood and feeling so well. But this morning we’ve had another hit and I don’t think we can ignore it now.

So we are going to keep hoping it’s all part of a treatable ear infection. Seems her antibiotics aren’t doing the trick. So we’ve upped the ante and I am adding oils to the treatment because I have to believe it can only help at this point.

Needless to say, we won’t have that easy-going feeling for a while. We are back on guard. And just when I thought good change was coming, we may have to put that on hold if we are back to where we started. No telling just yet. As always your support helps us through every day.

She will let us know when she is better. Right now we are just focused on getting to Monday when we can see the doctors.

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