Parenting. It’s Definitely Not Fair

I realized today no matter what I do I cannot give Reese the same first year Davis had.

There has been a new term in our house — fair. “You’re not being fair,” he whines. And it’s so much more true than he realizes.

We can’t sit on the floor all night and play with her, giggling at everything she does. She is growing up in a world of Tv and noise and lots of yelling as we try to get Davis’s attention. All things I intentionally avoided for his sake just a four short years ago — the last Olympics actually.

But she also gets to have someone fawn over her all the time. She has her own personal court jester and brave hero all in one. And he does dote on her in a different way than we could have ever given him.

I was determined to not fall to the double standard or give my second child less attention than the first. But it just isn’t possible to separate her from the rest of our life. And for her sake, her place in our family, it wouldn’t make sense, I guess.

Yes, this is a first born talking. But I am sensitive to it because I know these dynamics matter. They impact how you see yourself and choices you make as you grow up.

But then again, she is my last baby and I am already wanting to hold on to every last moment nostalgically knowing it will never happen again. So I guess in that way it’s something we feel for her that we never had for Davis. And maybe that makes them even.

Great day to be a mom

It was a great day to me a mom… My baby is developing her sense of humor and my son is such a sweet little man.

Reese finds her brother amusing, we all do. Today we discovered it isn’t just because Davis is silly. Bryan lobbed a squishy ball at Davis in the pool and when he got caught off guard by it tagging him in the head, Reese cracked up. Her full gut laugh was classic. So of course, Bryan had to test the theory and it’s pretty certain that she understood when Davis didn’t see it coming for his head/face she always laughed. When he caught it, she didn’t. Lucky for her, she has a lifetime of laughs in store, because these two boys live for an audience.

And as for Davis, he complimented me. “Mommy, I really like that dress.” he says very seriously and sincerely about an old sundress bathing suit cover up that I had thrown on. It’s never when I have actually put effort into looking nice that I receive the unsolicited comments. Occasionally, though, I get a sweet one like this.